فصل 95

emilia

The lace curtain flapped in the kitchen window. The breeze today was the kind you opened the shutters for, the kind that carried away old sin and flakes of sadness. The sun streamed through the window, blooming light through a jar of amber honey on the sill. I dipped my fingers into the cool sack of flour, sprinkled a handful across the board, and began to roll out the dough. Rachel and Helen were coming for tea after synagogue. They would be thrilled to have their favorite doughnuts with rose petal jam. Father would eat the leftovers for breakfast.

Something stirred by the sideboard.

“I see you, Halinka.” I laughed. My daughter peeked out from behind the cabinet.

“What are you sneaking around for?” I asked.

“Fairy bread.” She giggled. She was a beautiful whisper. If only I imagined her, my little bird could always be with me.

“Get a plate,” I told her.

She ran to the cupboard and returned with a plate, already licking her lips.

I cut a thick slice off the loaf while she sprinkled sugar onto the plate. I spread a layer of butter on the piece of bread and handed it to her. She gently pressed it facedown in the sugar. She then peeled it back up, slowly, careful not to lose a single crystal.

Halinka carried her fairy bread to the back door of the kitchen, which stood open to the unfenced yard and wildflowers. I had just returned to my dough when my daughter began jumping up and down.

“Mama, they’re back!” She dashed out into the yard, her silhouette fading, disappearing into the glistening sunlight.

I ran to the door just in time to see the storks soaring overhead.

“Did you see them, Emilia?”

I nodded, turning toward the voice.

My beautiful mother walked toward me through the grass with my baby brother.

“Did you see them, sweetheart?” she whispered. “They’ve come home.”

Mama smiled wide. She kissed me, handed me a jar of jam, and then walked into the kitchen. I leaned against the warm door frame, allowing the golden heat to envelop me.

I turned the lid and lifted the rose petal jam to my nose, savoring the scent. I raised my face to the sun. My war had been so long, my winters so cold. But I had finally made it home. And for the first time in a long time, I was not afraid.