فصل 10

CHAPTER 10

THE DRESS WAS RED. MOM hadn’t worn it in years, which was one of the reasons I chose it. Hale trimmed the long lace sleeves up to my elbows and pulled a few of the layers from beneath the gown so it wasn’t quite as full. He was right about some of this being irreversible, but he’d handled it all so tastefully that even if Mom eventually wanted it back, she’d probably be thrilled with the alterations.

Eloise helped me do my hair, and it looked so smart, with braids leading back to a modest bun. I chose a tiara with rubies in it, and I looked like I was on fire.

It was beautiful, really. I knew that, and I was thankful for all the hands that had gone into making me look like someone who could be trusted with the decisions that had to be made on behalf of the country. It just felt old, older than I truly was, though maybe closer to the age I should behave. Sighing, I came to terms with the dress. This was who I had to be for now.

I was tugging at my seams in the studio when Josie came up to talk to me. “That dress is amazing,” she praised, unable to keep her fingers off the layers of satin.

I kept straightening. “It’s my mother’s.”

“I’m sorry about all that, by the way,” she said quietly. “Don’t think I’ve told you yet.” I swallowed. “Thank you, Josie. That means a lot.”

“You know, since everything’s been so serious, it might be a good idea to have a party.” I huffed out an almost laugh. “I’m a little busy for that. Maybe once things settle down.” “I could plan it! Just let me talk to a few maids, and we could pull something together in a week.” I turned from the mirror. “Like I said, maybe one day, but not now.” I moved away, trying to focus.

She trailed me across the room, insistent. “But why? Shouldn’t you be celebrating? I mean, you’re practically the queen, so—” I spun on her, enraged. “But I am not the queen. That title belongs to my mother, who nearly died. That you so casually brush over that fact makes the condolences you just gave me meaningless. What don’t you get, Josie? Do you think this job is nothing but dresses and galas?” She stood there, stunned. I watched her eyes dart around the room, checking to see if anyone was watching our interaction. I didn’t want to humiliate her. In a way, I understood her. There might have been a time when nothing brought me more joy than a reason to start a guest list, a time when I thought this role was nothing more than dresses and galas myself. . . .

I sighed. “I’m not trying to insult you. But it would be inappropriate to throw a party when my mother is still recuperating. Please, what I need from you tonight is some level of understanding, which I realize may be too much, considering our history. Still, for my sanity, I beg you, just try to consider what it’s like to be in my shoes.” She sulked. “That’s all I’ve ever wanted. Of course that only matters to you when it’s convenient.” I wanted to rip her head off. What part about my life right now did she think was convenient? But I had a broadcast to think about.

“Excuse me?” I called to a passing maid. “Please escort Miss Josie to her room. Her attitude tonight is unsettling, and I need to concentrate.” “Yes, Your Highness.” The maid turned cheerfully to Josie, not worried about our personal issues and ready to do her job.

Josie huffed. “I hate you.”

I pointed to the door. “Yes, and you can do that from your room just as well as from here.” Without waiting to see if she obeyed, I made my way to my seat. I’d never seen it set up this way: the Elite on one side and a single chair on the other.

As I was staring at the sad, lonely seat, Kile sidled up to me.

“What was that with Josie?”

I smiled and batted my eyes. “Nothing, sweetheart. Just making me seriously doubt how much I want her as an in-law.” “Still too soon.”

I laughed. “No, we had a . . . disagreement. And I feel kind of bad, because I understand her. I just wish she could understand me.” “That might be hard for Josie. She’s only aware of herself. Also, have you seen Gunner?” I squinted. “He left this afternoon. Didn’t he say good-bye?”

Kile shook his head.

I walked over to the other boys, who all sat up straighter as I approached. “Did Gunner say good-bye to any of you?” The others shook their heads in confusion as Fox cleared his throat. “He stopped by to see me. Gunner’s a bit sentimental, and he didn’t have it in him to go through a long farewell. He just said this wasn’t right for him and that he had your approval to go.” “He did. We parted on very good terms.”

Fox nodded. “I think he thought he’d lose his resolve if he stuck around. He asked me to pass on to everyone how much he would miss you.” He smiled. “Really nice guy.” “He was. But take his words to heart,” I pleaded, looking at each of their faces. “This is about your futures as well. Don’t stay for something that you might not be able to handle.” Kile nodded, looking suddenly pensive. Hale gave me a bright smile. Ean was impassive as ever, and Henri was taking in Erik’s translation, looking confused.

Certainly I’d spend the rest of my evening overanalyzing their expressions, but for now, we had a show to put on.

“Hale,” I whispered, pointing to the gown. “Thank you.”

“Beautiful,” he mouthed. I knew he meant it, and I tried to hold myself taller. I wanted to do this dress justice tonight.

The cameras went on, and I greeted the country as honestly as I could.

“Let me begin with the news you’re most eager to hear. My mother is doing well. As I speak, she is healing in her room, with my father by her side.” I tried to stop focusing on how I was standing or what I should do with my hands. Instead I thought of my parents, no doubt watching this in pajamas with doctor-approved snacks by their sides. And when I pictured that, I smiled. “We all know that their love story may be the truest one ever told. Though it has been no small task to step into my father’s role.

“My brother, Ahren, now the prince consort of France, is also a testament to the power of the deepest love. From what I understand, he is settling into his new position very well and is already very happy to be a husband.” My smile crept through again. “None of this surprises me. His devotion to Princess Camille over both time and distance has been constant and strong, and I can only imagine his happiness at getting to be beside her every moment.

“As for the country at large”—I glanced at my notes, though I hated to do it—“some of the disquiet we’ve been experiencing has diminished over the last few weeks.” In one way that was absolutely true, but as far as disquiet related to me, my nose ought to be growing as I spoke. “Taking into account how much work my father has put into the cause of peace abroad, the thought that we could finally be achieving a greater peace at home brings me extraordinary joy.” I hit on everything I was supposed to—the budget proposal, the upcoming start to the drilling project, and the change in the advisory board, which made a few people in the room squirm—and when it was all done, I searched the crowd for a few important faces. Lady Brice gave me a big nod, as did General Leger. I saw Grandma fidgeting, impatient with the lengthy announcements, and likely only holding on so she could hear the boys speak. And, just off the stage, Erik smiled at me, pleased.

“Your Highness.” Gavril bowed as he spoke. “May I say, considering the circumstances under which you’ve been thrust into this role, you are doing a fantastic job.” “Thank you, sir.” I didn’t know how genuine that statement was, but maybe him saying it would make other people think it.

“One has to wonder, if you’ve been working at such a pace, have you made any time for this lot over here?” he asked, nodding his head toward the Elite.

“A little.”

“Really? Anything you can share with us?” He wiggled his eyebrows, and I was reminded again of the ways in which his on-camera personality differed from his off-camera one. Entertainment was his job, and he was great at it.

“Yes, but for fun—I won’t be using names.”

“Not using names?”

“For instance, one member of the Elite has left us today,” I said, though I knew this was a throwaway that’d be unraveled in seconds. “I would like to say of our departed suitor that he left in good spirits and as a friend.” “Ah, I see,” Gavril said. “I like this! Give us some more.”

“Well, today one of my suitors gave me a gift made from a very precious metal.” “Oh, my!” Gavril surveyed my hands, looking, as everyone would, for rings.

I held them up for the world to see. “No, not gold. It was steel. He gave me a sewing pin. But I promise, it was very special.” Chuckles arose from our audience and from the Elite, and I hoped that this was as charming on camera as it was in my head.

“Please tell me you have at least one more,” Gavril pleaded.

“One more,” I allowed. “Earlier this week, one of the Elite told me he definitely wasn’t in love with me, and I told him I felt the same way.” Gavril was wide-eyed. “Is this the same young man who happened to leave us?” “No. And that’s the crazy part. We’re not in love and yet we have no desire to be separated, so there you go.” I gave a playful shrug, and smiled as I listened to the sighs and laughter around the room.

“While I’m sure a fair share of our country will be up late tonight trying to guess who you’re talking about, it would be nice to have something a bit more solid.” “You might have to talk to the boys about that.”

“Then I think we shall do just that. May I go and quiz these handsome young men?” “By all means,” I replied with a smile, happy to back out of the spotlight for one beautiful moment.

“All right, let’s start down here. Sir Fox, how are you?”

“Very good, sir. Thank you.” He sat up a little straighter and smiled brightly.

“The people understand that the princess has been under a lot of stress and her days are packed full, so the one-on-one time has been limited,” Gavril said graciously.

“Yeah, it was impressive to see how hard she was working before, so seeing her take on even more these last few days . . . it’s inspiring.” I tipped my head, feeling a little warm inside. Inspiring? That was such a kind thought.

Gavril nodded in agreement. “Considering all that, could you tell us something from your time with the princess that has stood out against all the rest?” Instantly, a smile came to Fox’s face. “I suppose the most significant moment of our relationship would be after the fight, when Burke went home. She came and spoke to me and was so honest about what she hoped for. She listened to me, too. I think that’s a side of her that few people have the privilege of seeing. It’s not as if she can go door-to-door giving everyone an hour of her time . . . but when she’s with you, she’s all there. She’s really hearing you.” I remembered that night with Fox warmly, but I didn’t realize how much it had meant to him. He’d treasured that moment.

Kile raised his hand. “I’d have to agree with that. Everyone knows that Ead—uh, the princess and I really only began our friendship recently. And in that time, I’ve felt a lot of my worries and aspirations have been heard.” “Like what?” Gavril prodded.

He shrugged. “I mean, it’s nothing exciting, but I do have a passion for architecture, and the princess actually sat down and looked at my sketches.” He raised a finger as if he suddenly remembered something. “Granted, we’d had some wine, and I’m sure she was very bored, but still.” Everyone chuckled, and I smiled at Kile. He made being on camera look so easy, always coming up with wonderful things to say. It made me feel surer I’d made the right call telling him how I felt.

Carrying the momentum, Gavril bypassed Henri and headed straight to Ean. I hated that Henri was being excluded, but it looked like Gavril had a plan.

“Sir Ean, you are maybe the quietest one of the bunch. Do you have anything to add?” His expression was as cool as ever. “I am a man of few words,” he agreed, “but I will say that the princess is incredibly thoughtful. Though there are only five of us left, none of the eliminations were made flippantly. Just by getting to know these other gentlemen, I can see the effort the princess has put into making the best possible choice for herself and for her people.

“What the cameras couldn’t capture was the mood in the Men’s Parlor when she had to make her most recent elimination. There wasn’t a drop of animosity in the air. She’s been so generous with us that it was impossible to be upset. All the other suitors left satisfied.” Gavril nodded. “So how do you think your chances are? You’ve made it to the top five!” Ean, as always, was nothing but smooth. “I am at Her Highness’s disposal. She is the best woman any of us could possibly attain, and as such has incredible standards. It’s not about my assessment of my odds, it’s about her preference. For that we will all wait and see.” I’d never heard Ean speak so much at once, but I found myself feeling instantly indebted to him. Though we had an understanding in our relationship, and it was admittedly unromantic, he still saw so much good in me. That, or he was an incredible actor.

“Very interesting. What about you, Sir Hale? As I recall, you had the first date with the princess. How are you feeling right now?” “I feel lucky,” he said warmly. “I’ve grown up seeing her in parades, and watching her on television, and seeing her face in magazines.” He pointed across the room at me. “She’s so pretty it’s intimidating, and she has this look like maybe she could burn you with her eyes if she felt like it.” Part of that stung, but there was something so terribly honest about it that I couldn’t not smile.

“But I got to have dinner with her once and made her laugh so hard she spit her drink out.” “Hale!”

He shrugged. “Someone would find out someday. You might as well share!”

I covered my face with my hands, wondering what Mom and Dad would think of all this.

“My point is, everything we’ve said about her is true. She’s tough, she’s a leader, and, yes, I think if she wanted to shoot fire from her eyes, she could do it.” The room chuckled. “But she’s also a great listener, and is invested, and knows how to laugh. Like, really laugh. I’m not sure everyone will get to see that, so I feel lucky that I did.” The entire segment was such a glorious tribute to my finer qualities that I almost wondered if the boys had been coached. And if they had, then I owed something huge to whoever thought of it.

As the cameras went down, I walked over to Gavril. “Thank you. You were outstanding tonight.” “I have always been on your side, and I always will be.” He winked at me and went on his way.

I watched as the audience filtered out, and I stood there a moment feeling proud. I’d gotten through it, almost entirely on my own. The Elite were fantastic, kinder than I could have guessed or hoped. Mom and Dad were going to be so pleased.

“Well done.” Kile wrapped an arm around me. “Your first solo Report is in the books!” “I seriously thought tonight might be a disaster, but look!” I said, leaping away and holding out my arms. “I’m still in one piece.” Hale came over and chuckled. “Did you think people would stream in through the doors and tear you to bits?” “You never know!”

Fox laughed, and Ean stood back, still smiling. I was so grateful. If I’d known how to articulate it, I’d have unabashedly gushed about how great they’d been tonight.

“Dinner?” Fox asked, and the boys all nodded.

I heard Henri saying one word over and over again excitedly, which I assumed meant he was thrilled to be getting food. We all formed a little group and walked to the dining hall together.